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A Journal of Seismic Proportions

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On the Cusp
23 October 1982
At 22 I found myself spinning in a direction I’d never expected. Breath, gather yourself together and move forward, Now, at 25, I have nearly forgotten what it is like to live under the rules of another.

I collect “things”. I speak my mind. I watch too much CNN. I love yoga. I’ll send you a postcard. I wouldn’t mind having a Peacock as a pet. Red wine makes me blush and gives me a hangover. I love it. I love you. I prefer sleeping alone but I love sleeping with you anyway. I’ll never have too many shoes. I want to be buried in designer jeans. I usually like having roommates. Dating is just as overrated as I thought it was in high school; it’s nice to know everything about me hasn’t changed. I’m still afraid of getting old. I don’t hate myself every day. I’m usually all or nothing. I really mean it when I say I’m happy this way. I don’t think you’re always wrong. I don’t think I’m always right. I’ll apologize first. I do whatever I want to do. I’m always late. I probably won’t cancel my plans for you. I probably won’t cancel my plans with you for someone else. I’d rather not commit…to anything. I can now say yes to any number of questions one might ask me if they wanted to write a book about my life. When you ask if I like sports I'll say no, are you really that surprised? I’m a better person when I’m alone. I count the minutes. I love perfect silence. I don’t miss you. I can never get tired of the sun on my skin. I belong somewhere else. I found so much more when I was left to my own devices. If you can’t tell what sort of mood I’m in just ask me. I’ll spend too much money on bed sheets. I could care less what your family thinks of me. Chances are they probably love me. I said I would never again be something I wasn’t for another person and it proves to be tougher than I was expecting.


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